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Three Things to Know Before Telling Adult Children About a Gray Divorce


Telling the kids that you and your spouse are getting a divorce is incredibly difficult. People often think that it will most affect the children when they are young. As such, there are many resources for parents of minors that can help them through these difficult situations. Unfortunately, there are not as many resources for people who are getting a gray divorce and have adult children.

Due to the fact that your children are now independent, you may think telling them will be easy. That is rarely the case. Before breaking the news to your adult children, our Orlando divorce lawyer outlines some things to remember.

It is Still Shocking News 

Your grown children may already know or suspect that things are not right between you and their other parent. This is not always the case, though, and even if it is, the news may still shock your children. Even if your kids no longer live with you and your spouse, your children may still feel upset by the news and it is important to prepare for that. Divorce is still a major change in your children’s life, even when it does not affect them on a daily basis. Remember that your kids may still need time to adjust.

You May Need to Reassure Them 

Just because your children are now adults does not mean they will feel differently about the divorce than they would have when they were younger. They may become angry with you and lash out. Or, they may even turn that anger inward and blame themselves. They may think that you only stayed together as long as you did, and remained unhappy in the meantime, because of them. Reassure them that your marital problems, and resulting divorce, are not their fault and that you have made decisions that were best for you and your spouse now, and in the past.

You May Still Have to Co-Parent

 When people think of co-parenting, they often think of dropping children off for custody exchanges, or picking them up. If your children are adults, these tasks will not be necessary. Still, it is critical to remember that you may still have to co-parent with your former spouse. Important events such as graduations, weddings, and holidays will still come up and it is important that you plan for them. Remain empathetic and reassure your children that you and your former spouse will both continue to be there for them and that you will co-parent peacefully.

Get Advice from a Divorce Lawyer in Orlando 

Divorces involving  adult children can be a bit more straightforward than those involving younger kids, as you will not need to develop a parenting plan or resolve child support issues. However, you still need legal advice. At Anderson & Ferrin,  P.A., our Orlando divorce lawyer can guide you through the process and ensure that you receive the fairest settlement possible. Call us now at 407-412-7041 or contact us online to schedule a free initial consultation.



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